The Fix by Six?

Last night per usual Johnny had a hard time falling asleep. Calming his body into rest is not an easy task for him. Usually I try to deny his sweet requests for a million hugs and try to remind him it’s not the time to run, giggle, or sing. But on this cold January night,Continue reading “The Fix by Six?”

Christmas Through Johnny’s Eyes

Christmas is so much. It’s busy, it’s loud, it’s joyful, it’s frustrating, it’s a lot. I love it though. I love it for religious reasons, I love being with family, I love yummy treats, and I love presents. I get so caught up in it.   I have so many deep seeded memories when it comesContinue reading “Christmas Through Johnny’s Eyes”

Where were you?

I didn’t know you. We were always together,  I fed you from my body, then my hands,  I bathed you, I changed you, I’ve always loved you. But you were somewhere else. Where were you? My son Johnny is now five years old. He is autistic. And I feel like I did not really know him forContinue reading “Where were you?”

Unqualified

Unqualified.  That’s how I felt when I found out my son was diagnosed with Autism at almost 5 years old. We knew it was coming, but now it was official. Things were never going to get magically easier. This was a lifetime calling. I was not prepared. I hated making appointments, filling out paperwork, awkwardContinue reading “Unqualified”

Sorrow, Sadness, Hope

Grief is usually a word associated with death.  A deep pain and sorrow that stabs at the heart. A mourning. I think that’s why a lot of people take issue with parents of autistic, or other special needs children, saying they had to grieve when they found out. How can you grieve for your living child?Continue reading “Sorrow, Sadness, Hope”

Lunchbox

Today I forgot Johnny’s lunchbox and it’s been a day.  Yesterday was an amazing day. We went to a nearby farm for their pumpkin patch and other fall activities. Johnny did amazing. He watched a magic show and laughed hysterically, he interacted with us, picked a pumpkin, and played with his cousins. Of course, afterContinue reading “Lunchbox”