momlife

Protecting Johnny’s Spirit: The Parenting Journey of an Autistic Child

When I first started my blog, I named it “Johnny’s Spirit” after my son’s nickname. While I’ve shared the story behind his nickname, I don’t believe I’ve ever explained why I chose that name for my blog. As a parent of an autistic child, one of my biggest concerns is protecting my son’s spirit. HisContinue reading “Protecting Johnny’s Spirit: The Parenting Journey of an Autistic Child”

You and Me, Kid

To my Johnny, I can see it now; The chaos, the fear, the love, the moment you entered the world. It was 10:31pm and the room was full. Nurses and staff running about, Dad, Grammy and your Aunt Shauna cheering with joy, machines beeping and a baby crying. In a strangely unceremonious way you wereContinue reading “You and Me, Kid”

Worry vs Wonder

Oh to wonder. I miss it. It’s a little over a year since my six year old son, Johnny, was diagnosed with autism and I can’t even imagine wondering about his future. From the beginning of pregnancy up until age two I wondered a lot. Who’d he be, where life would take, everything a parentContinue reading “Worry vs Wonder”

Where were you?

I didn’t know you. We were always together, I fed you from my body, then my hands, I bathed you, I changed you, I’ve always loved you. But you were somewhere else. Where were you? My son Johnny is now five years old. He is autistic. And I feel like I did not really know him forContinue reading “Where were you?”

Lunchbox

Today I forgot Johnny’s lunchbox and it’s been a day. Yesterday was an amazing day. We went to a nearby farm for their pumpkin patch and other fall activities. Johnny did amazing. He watched a magic show and laughed hysterically, he interacted with us, picked a pumpkin, and played with his cousins. Of course, afterContinue reading “Lunchbox”

Why I Cry

To my little boy, You probably know by now, but your mom is a crier. I cry a lot. I cry when embarrassed, when frustrated, when sad, even when I’m happy. I have cried for you many times. I remember crying on the car ride home when you cried in the corner the whole timeContinue reading “Why I Cry”